Why am I not going to the TLC Conference?

1) Because I cannot afford it.

It’s on the other side of the world for me. Several thousand pounds for one weekend? When you add up the registration, the flights, the traveling, the food, the insurance… it sure adds up. Last year, I was lucky enough to go through funding provided from you guys/Trichster Film - thankyou.

(Someone recently offered to pay for this year, which was exceptionally kind, I had to decline because of schooling….)

2) Because I am at film school full time.

Last year, I took time off and it affected my schooling and school friendships severely. I had a great time away but it ruined things when I came home. This year, I’m on a feature film production for 6 weeks solid. Leaving the production for a week will not only affect my grade but will be detrimental to our production. I can’t have time off.

3) I just don’t feel it’s for me right now.

Even though the TLC Conference is fantastic for many, especially newcomers, I don’t think that it’s beneficial for me at the moment. I don’t find the over-optimism helpful and last year, I felt extremely out of place with my views and outlook. I’m extremely solid in how I feel and I don’t think my viewpoint fits in.

That being said, it was/is great to meet people and hug… and that I love, but as a helping mechanism/therapy event, there is only so much it can do for me personally. Trichster are doing things this year and it would have been good to have been a part of that and to say hello to old friends…


I think everyone should have the opportunity to go at some point though, I may not benefit as such but I know many others would and do. (This post was more about me and a little how I relate to the TLC Conference. :).)

This is what the last 3/4 months of year 11 did to me.

20th March 2009 Initial exams + prep begins.

10th+11th April 2009

13th May 2009 - Main GCSE’s exams kicked off.

17th June 2009

20th June 2009 - Last Exam followed by Prom.

13th+14th July 2009 - Finished school and now on break.

Were my high grades worth losing my hair? I don’t think so, I still haven’t recovered from this and we’re now hitting the 5 year mark :(.

(By the way, the hair loss increased in severity and occurrence after that summer, it got far worse than the above).


17th April 2012. Cats love us, no matter what we look like (providing we give them food)!


Teaser for tomorrow.

I did struggle to make these, despite their simplicity and I felt a bit down <3.

Editing this entire video highlighted my latest pulling areas, it really upset me to be honest.

There is more than my hair.

When all of my business emails (professional contact portal) in the last week have been Trichotillomania related.

Not a sign of non-Trichotillomanianess.

It’s like it’s my Trichotillomania help line.

Trich girl.

That’s all I’m wanted for.


Sure I expect some Trich content and inquiries, that’s cool, but the fact that I’m never seen for anything else is so degrading.

There is more to me than my hair or lack of!

Write deeper about characters with disorders/conditions.


People are made up of many things and are most certainly more than their conditions. A successful story where a condition forms a large part of the subject matter, needs characters that have to be more complex than simply having and talking about a disorder for the entire book.

It’s fascinating to hear a story from the perspective of a character coping with a condition, but we need to connect to the person too. If you remove the condition from the text and there is very little left about that character, then it’s just a condition-story. I want to know about the character, who they are inside, not just their physicality’s.

Seriously struggling to put my thoughts into words.

Trying to put it into another light:

As a vlogger with Trichotillomania creating Trichotillomania videos, if I focus purely on Trichotillomania statistics and quotes from medical texts then of course people will switch off and be bored. I’m a presenter, not a real person…

If I talk about things from my perspective and also have my personal channel alongside - people can understand both the condition from a medical perspective + the condition from my own experiences but also see how I manage to live my life whilst coping with it too. People see me as a person, not just a person with Trichotillomania.

I do hope this makes sense.

This is about the book “The Fault In Our Stars” - John Green. But seeing as I mentioned Trichotillomania, I’m reblogging it here.

I blow dried my hair differently today, it’s sitting better, horay! Much better!

Sitting outside in the sun, on my break and suddenly, I noticed the sun wasn’t in my eyes. I have enough hair to act as a barrier. This is new. It’s also new to feel the sun on my hair, then to run my cool fingers through the hot strands of gold. It’s also occurred to me, that I actually have the hair to soak up the sun, therefore - I may end up being blonder by the autumn! I’ve missed going blond in summer! I’ve almost grown used to having dark grey/blonde hair all year round!

I have a hair plan. If I manage to keep it as it is… I’m going to start growing out the sides in September. That gives me enough time to both physically and mentally prepare for the battle. I still have some loss and new growth in extremely unforgiving places…. :(. Also, summer wise, I don’t think I could cope with the extra unwanted hair in that humidity.


When you can’t sleep: edit.


Photos Of My Life alongside Draw My Life.

Draw My Life - Beckie0.

You have no idea how strong I am.

(via beckie0)


A Good Person

Twitter | Instagram | YouTube

There is a fantastic comment thread on the video itself! I’d love it if you have something to add, you came along! :D

(via beckie0)


For the first time in years, I have more hair than my Dad <3.