Hello, my name is Rebecca. I'm known as Beckie0 on YouTube. This is my journal about my experiences with Trichotillomania.

Being hit but I’ll keep standing.

There are people in our community love to tear me down because they know I will stand back up. I’m an easy target: some of my opinions are outside the box, I’m vocal and not afraid to speak and I’ve proven I can stand up after constant attacks.

Why bully someone if they are just going to curl up and hide or delete their profiles? Bullying someone who puts up a fight is far more fun (!) :/.

I appreciate all need support and somewhere to vent or lash out, but I am not your outlet. I will not go down, even as you treat me as your punching bag.

— 19 hours ago with 42 notes

#bullying  #trichotillomania  #trichotillomania community  #trichers 
My spontaneous vlogging appears to have created enough for two separate videos on two different topics! I’ll post one tomorrow and the other after the weekend.

My spontaneous vlogging appears to have created enough for two separate videos on two different topics! I’ll post one tomorrow and the other after the weekend.

— 20 hours ago with 27 notes

#beckie0  #trichotillomania  #trichjournal 
Concerned with others pain.

I wish people would stop torturing themselves with trying to be pull free.

Something occurred to me today. I’m 21 but I think I have far more experience and knowledge of others suffering than I think a normal Tricher would have. Maybe I just discovered how terrible this Pull Free pulling lark is, before my own time.

Thing is, children don’t listen to parents, even when the parent’s advice is often the best thing there is. “Younger/inexperienced” Trichers may need to go through those years of suffering, trying to kill their Trich will Pull Free Vibes, in order to see how detrimental it is.

I just hate seeing so many people trapped in pull-free-land. I wish I could lift the veil, prove that it doesn’t work long term and help them accept that this condition is here to stay - which isn’t easy - but far less traumatic a pathway.

— 21 hours ago with 44 notes

#beckie0  #trichotillomania  #trichjournal  #pull free 
beckie0:

The family (minus two cats and two “non-blood-great” relatives :).

By October, I will have moved back to Essex (though I will not finish my course and graduate till November). I will be living with my Mum, Dad and younger brother in our family home of 15 years. My sister will be at Uni and my brother is on a foundation year before he goes too. My Grandad has been living with my parents on and off all year, but sold his house and moving into a bungalow in our hometown.
Things are really going to shake up in the next three months. I’m seriously nervous as to how things are going to go and how things are going to result.

beckie0:

The family (minus two cats and two “non-blood-great” relatives :).

By October, I will have moved back to Essex (though I will not finish my course and graduate till November). I will be living with my Mum, Dad and younger brother in our family home of 15 years. My sister will be at Uni and my brother is on a foundation year before he goes too. My Grandad has been living with my parents on and off all year, but sold his house and moving into a bungalow in our hometown.

Things are really going to shake up in the next three months. I’m seriously nervous as to how things are going to go and how things are going to result.

— 21 hours ago with 51 notes

Cutting it yesterday has worked wonders, that and all the Argan oil I’ve been experimenting with this week! I bought a bottle and it’s been magic. It’s still all wispy and thin, not thick like it was in february, furthermore, I’ve been tearing constantly. Hmm.

— 23 hours ago with 52 notes

#beckie0  #argan oil  #argan 
I think is bad for us, but I was curious… burning hair.

I think is bad for us, but I was curious… burning hair.

— 1 day ago with 28 notes

beckie0:

After three years of being forbidden to burn my incense and candles, (Uni accommodation rules,) I bought and lit my first candle. It made me quite emotional.

beckie0:

After three years of being forbidden to burn my incense and candles, (Uni accommodation rules,) I bought and lit my first candle. It made me quite emotional.

— 1 day ago with 78 notes

5am. Just cut my own hair, I haven’t had the courage to cut into my fringe further, for fear of going wrong. Parts of the fringe were longer (still longer) and poking my eye constantly. I had thought to cut it all to what I want but yes, I am a coward. 

Seriously unhappy with my appearance at the moment, people just keep flooding me with compliments. I appreciate the support and I know it’s difficult to know what to say, but I seriously am not happy with my hair, compliments won’t make it all better :(. Xxx

5am. Just cut my own hair, I haven’t had the courage to cut into my fringe further, for fear of going wrong. Parts of the fringe were longer (still longer) and poking my eye constantly. I had thought to cut it all to what I want but yes, I am a coward.

Seriously unhappy with my appearance at the moment, people just keep flooding me with compliments. I appreciate the support and I know it’s difficult to know what to say, but I seriously am not happy with my hair, compliments won’t make it all better :(. Xxx

— 2 days ago with 62 notes

#trichotillomania  #hurt  #fringe 
my-ponchoboys:

Karen at LAX~ 24 August 2014

my-ponchoboys:

Karen at LAX~ 24 August 2014

— 3 days ago with 359 notes

Karen Gillan has more hair than I do.

I do not know how to process this.

— 3 days ago with 22 notes

#Trichotillomania  #hurt  #angry  #jealous 

nodaybuttodaytodefygravity:

i would have no use for this

there’s not a reason in the world i could ever come up with to use this product

but i want it

This looks perfect! What is it?

(Source: teknolojimanya, via 87daysbefore)

— 4 days ago with 198912 notes

I hate the Trichotillomania group, oh forgoodnessake, I cannot believe the immaturity and need for attention in there. Everyone wants to tear someone else down, if they have no control over their own Trich, they like to attack others that do. It’s incredible, really. It’s like being tied down in a kiddie pen, I just want to be with the adults! :(.

I hate the Trichotillomania group, oh forgoodnessake, I cannot believe the immaturity and need for attention in there. Everyone wants to tear someone else down, if they have no control over their own Trich, they like to attack others that do. It’s incredible, really. It’s like being tied down in a kiddie pen, I just want to be with the adults! :(.

— 5 days ago with 67 notes

#beckie0  #trichotillomania